Giving And Receiving Criticism - Part 3
"If we clam up when someone starts to criticise, we may never listen enough to hear the truth of what they are bringing."
Over the last couple of weeks, we've been focusing on how to give biblical criticism, specifically in a church context.
In these next two posts, we're going to look at how to biblically receive criticism when, not if, it happens.
Here's the first point...
Resolve to respond, not react to criticism from others
This is something we can decide on once and for all, and then just keep reminding ourselves of it. Respond, don’t react! There is a difference between the two - the first is seeing the criticism objectively, while the second is taking it personally.
Of course, some criticisms are personal, and they hurt; but even so, responding and not reacting is a great place to begin.
Listen with a humble heart, for whatever truth there may be in the criticism (even if it’s brought in a bad way)
I’ll never forget reading in a book one time that even when someone brings a criticism in the worst possible way and that seems totally out of place and uncalled for, there will nearly always be some truth you can find there. And you can respond to that with thankfulness! It's a real test of character, there’s no doubt about that, but it’s a great response to have.
If we clam up when someone starts to criticise, we may never listen enough to hear the truth of what they are bringing. It's important to remember that if we had been humble enough to listen, their criticism may well have been a great benefit to us. So remember, we have 2 ears and one mouth for a reason!
Thank the person for being willing to speak to you (there will be others who didn’t!)
If someone has been inappropriate or out of line in the way they have brought a criticism to us, responding in this way can help diffuse the tension and lessen any further unwanted criticism.
It’s always good to remember that, as much as we don’t like criticism, it’s often true that the person who brought it was loving enough to stick their neck on the line and tell us. Others might think the same thing, and even say it behind our backs, but they don’t have the courage to come and tell us in person. So, don’t be too hard on the messenger - they are normally doing you an act of service for your benefit.
Don’t necessarily agree, or accept the criticism, but say you will have a think and pray about it
Just because someone brings something to us, it doesn’t mean we have to change or adjust right away. It may be the case, and that should be obvious to us, but most of the time, it’s fine to just thank them for bringing it to you, and say you will have a think and pray, and get back to them.
Then, if it was a valid and helpful criticism, do go back to that person. This is really important because they may not have found it easy to approach you, and may be wondering if they offended or upset you.
And next week, we'll look at the last three points on receiving criticism.
[Return to The Church Piano Player Website]
This blog post was written by pastor and pianist Kris Baines, from The Church Piano Player. Kris lives in the UK with his family, having recently moved back from New Zealand where he worked as a pastor for the past 26 years (also leading worship/worship teams). Kris has also spent over 35 years writing, recording, and performing music and is now bringing all that combined experience together to help equip church piano/keyboard players.
Check out the church piano player website for more information on online courses by Kris Baines.
📧WANT TO RECEIVE NEW BLOG POSTS DIRECT TO YOUR INBOX?📧
SIGN UP BELOW
